Drop OSX support; support desktop, laptop, cloudtop

Dropping support for OSX. Moving forward these dotfiles will depend on Linux
systems. Furthermore, since I'm support a ~/bin, the machines that consume these
dotfiles depend on i386 architectures. Linux and i386 are two dependencies that
I'm okay with since the leverage this assumption provides, makes their existence
tolerable.

There is some Google leakage herein, which includes aliases, functions, and
mentions of cloudtop. For now, this is okay. I may break the Google specific
code into its own repository, but for now, this is less maintenance.

This also introduces a ~/.profile instead of erroneously defining environment
variables in my zshrc file, which was unadvised.

This is a large commit and also introduces new aliases, variables, functions
that I accumulated over the past week or so while migrating away from OSX and
onto my new setup. Hopefully in the future I'll be more precise with my commits.

6 files changed, 634 insertions, 470 deletions

diff --git a/configs/shared/zsh/.zshrc b/configs/shared/zsh/.zshrc
index 721bc8c74cab..349e7cebf0df 100644
--- a/configs/shared/zsh/.zshrc
+++ b/configs/shared/zsh/.zshrc
@@ -5,8 +5,6 @@ antigen use oh-my-zsh
 
 # Bundles from robbyrussell's oh-my-zsh repo.
 antigen bundle git
-antigen bundle alias-tips      # friendly reminders to prefer an alias if exists
-# antigen bundle common-aliases  # be careful with the load order here. Can easily eclipse aliases undesirably
 antigen bundle extract         # extracts archives polymorphically
 antigen bundle zsh-completions # extracts archives polymorphically
 
@@ -16,19 +14,20 @@ antigen bundle zsh-users/zsh-syntax-highlighting
 # Theming
 # This supports different ZSH themes for each machine
 case "$(hostname)" in
-  wpcarro.c.googlers.com)      antigen theme cloud;;
-  wpcarro.lon.corp.google.com) antigen theme frisk;;
-  *)                           antigen theme refined;;
+  # desktop
+  wpcarro.lon.corp.google.com)
+    antigen theme frisk;;
+  # cloudtop
+  wpcarro.c.googlers.com)
+    antigen theme cloud;;
+  # laptop
+  wpcarro.roam.googlers.com)
+    antigen theme refined;;
 esac
 
 # Leave this last
 antigen apply
 
-# Personal Configuration
-
-# Set environment variables for Nix
-source ~/.nix-profile/etc/profile.d/nix.sh
-
 # Configure fzf
 source "$(fzf-share)/key-bindings.zsh"
 
@@ -45,9 +44,7 @@ fi
 # Directories.
 zstyle ':completion:*' users root $USER
 
-# use full path instead of $DOTFILES, since DOTFILES is set herein
-DOTFILES="$HOME/programming/dotfiles"
 source "$DOTFILES/configs/shared/zsh/variables.zsh"
 source "$DOTFILES/configs/shared/zsh/aliases.zsh"
 source "$DOTFILES/configs/shared/zsh/functions.zsh"
-source "$DOTFILES/configs/shared/zsh/dumping_grounds.zsh"
+source "$DOTFILES/configs/shared/zsh/zle.zsh"
diff --git a/configs/shared/zsh/aliases.zsh b/configs/shared/zsh/aliases.zsh
index ad00763dad59..4322c861725a 100644
--- a/configs/shared/zsh/aliases.zsh
+++ b/configs/shared/zsh/aliases.zsh
@@ -1,11 +1,21 @@
 # Applications
-# dired:  di
-# docker: dk
+#
+# Supported qualifiers:
+#   hidden:      h
+#   ignore-case: i
+#
+# Supported verbs:
+#   source:  s
+#   install: i
+#   test:    t
+#   build:   b
+#   list:    ls
 
 # Misc
 alias c="xclip -selection clipboard -i"
 alias p="xclip -selection clipboard -o"
-alias md="mkdir_cd"
+alias mdd="mkdir_cd"
+alias mdp='mkdir --parents'
 alias ls="exa"
 alias ll="exa -l"
 alias la="exa -la"
@@ -21,14 +31,21 @@ alias btctl=bluetoothctl
 alias rg='rg --ignore-case'
 alias rgh='rg --hidden' # By default, rg skips hidden files
 alias fdh='fd --hidden' # By default, rg skips hidden files
+alias define=sdcv # uses stardict to lookup a word
 
 # Gnome
 alias na=nautilus # Gnome's graphical file browser. Useful to click and dragging files into emails
 
+# Tmux
+alias tls='tmux list-sessions'
+
 # Chrome
 alias cssh='chrome --app-id=pnhechapfaindjhompbnflcldabbghjo' # Secure Shell
 alias crd='chrome --app-id=gbchcmhmhahfdphkhkmpfmihenigjmpp'  # Chrome Remote Desktop
 
+# Dropbox
+alias drst='dropbox.py status'
+
 # Docker
 alias dk="docker"
 alias dkps="docker ps"
@@ -90,7 +107,7 @@ alias hgco='hg update'
 alias sb="stack build"
 alias se="stack exec --"
 alias sc="stack clean"
-alias st="stack test"
+# alias st="stack test" # blocks suckless-terminal
 alias haddocks='open "$(stack path --local-doc-root)/index.html"'
 
 # Kubernetes
@@ -107,6 +124,12 @@ alias nq="nix_introspect"
 alias nsh="nix-shell"
 alias nshp="nix-shell --pure"
 alias nr="nix repl"
+alias ni='nix-env --install'
+alias nrm='nix-env --uninstall'
+alias nls='nix-env --query'
+
+# Aptitude (apt)
+alias apti='sudo apt-get install'
 
 # couple the e* aliases to the <leader>e* kbds in vim
 alias ev='e ~/.config/nvim/init.vim'
@@ -117,6 +140,7 @@ alias ef='e ~/functions.zsh'
 alias el='e ~/variables.zsh'
 alias ex='e ~/.Xresources'
 alias ei='e ~/.config/i3/config'
+alias em='e ~/.tmux.conf'
 
 # couple the s* aliases to the <leader>s* kbds in vim
 alias sz='source ~/.zshrc'
@@ -125,6 +149,7 @@ alias sf='source ~/functions.zsh'
 alias sl='source ~/variables.zsh'
 alias sx='xrdb ~/.Xresources'
 alias si='i3-msg restart'
+alias sm='tmux source-file ~/.tmux.conf'
 
 # Google aliases
 # blaze:      bz
@@ -138,5 +163,6 @@ alias br='borgcfg'
 alias pils='p4 listclients'
 alias pirm='p4 citc -d'
 alias pb=/google/src/head/depot/eng/tools/pastebin
-alias pbc='p | pb --private --title $(date +${DATE_FMT})| tee >(c && chrome $(p))' # create a private gPaste from your clipboard's content; open the result in a browser
+alias pbc='pb --private --title $(date +${date_fmt})| tee >(c && chrome $(p))' # create a private gPaste from your clipboard's content; open the result in a browser
+alias pbcp='p | pb --private --title $(date +${date_fmt})| tee >(c && chrome $(p))' # create a private gPaste from your clipboard's content; open the result in a browser
 alias pbls='$BROWSER https://paste.googleplex.com/$(whoami)'
diff --git a/configs/shared/zsh/dumping_grounds.zsh b/configs/shared/zsh/dumping_grounds.zsh
deleted file mode 100644
index e61164fc64d1..000000000000
--- a/configs/shared/zsh/dumping_grounds.zsh
+++ /dev/null
@@ -1,433 +0,0 @@
-#!/usr/bin/env zsh
-
-# Docker
-dsh() {
-  # Drop into a Docker shell. Shell defaults to /bin/bash.
-  container=$1
-  cmd=${2-/bin/bash}
-
-  docker exec -it "${container}" "${cmd}"
-}
-
-# Emacs
-dired() {
-  # Opens either the `$(pwd)` or `$1` in Emacs's `dired`.
-  # Uses i3 to focus Emacs.
-  directory=${1:-$(pwd)}
-  echo $directory
-  emacsclient --eval "(dired \"$directory\")" && focus Emacs
-}
-
-org_capture() {
-  # Spawns an Emacs frame running org-capture.
-  echo called
-  emacsclient --create-frame \
-              --frame-parameters '(quote (name . "org-protocol-capture"))' \
-              --eval '(org-capture)'
-}
-
-# Git
-conflicts() {
-  # Edit git conflicts one-by-one in your favorite editor.
-  ${EDITOR} "$(git status --porcelain | awk '/^UU/ { print $2 }')"
-}
-
-# GPG
-gpg_encrypt() {
-  # Convenience function around encryping files and directories.
-  # Appends a .gpg extension and deletes the unencrypted source.
-  local file=${1}
-
-  echo "Encrypting..."
-
-  if [ -f "${file}" ]; then
-    gpg --symmetric "${file}" && \
-    rm "${file}"
-
-  elif [ -d "${file}" ]; then
-    tar -cz "${file}" | gpg --symmetric --output "${file}.tar.gz.gpg"
-  fi
-
-  echo "Done."
-}
-
-gpg_decrypt() {
-  # Convenience function around decrypting .gpg files and directories.
-  # Deletes the original encrypted file with the .gpg extension.
-  local file=$1
-
-  echo "Decrypting..."
-
-  if [ -f "${file}" ]; then
-    gpg --decrypt "${file}" >"${file%.gpg}" && \
-    rm "${file}"
-
-  elif [ -d "${file}" ]; then
-    local outdir="${dirname%.tar.gz.gpg}"
-
-    if [ -d "${outdir}" ]; then
-      echo "Output directory, ${outdir}, already exists and will be overwritten by this command. Aborting..."
-      return 1
-    else
-      gpg --decrypt "${dirname}" | tar -xv
-    fi
-  fi
-
-  echo "Done."
-}
-
-# Python
-python_sandbox() {
-  # Creates a nix-shell with the specified arguments as Python packages
-  nix-shell -p "python36.withPackages(p: with p; [$@])"
-}
-
-# Haskell
-cabal_unhell() {
-  # Run this function to save yourself from Cabal hell.
-  # Note: this will require that you reinstall packages for your projects again.
-  find ~/.ghc -maxdepth 1 -type d -exec rm -rf {} \;
-  rm -rf ~/.cabal/{lib,packages,share}
-}
-
-haskell_sandbox() {
-  # Creates a nix-shell with the specified arguments as Haskell packages
-  nix-shell -p "haskellPackages.ghcWithPackages (p: with p; [$@])"
-}
-
-_haskell_test_watch_path() {
-  # Runs and watches the tests for a provided file path.
-  ghcid -c "stack ghci grid:lib grid:grid-test --ghci-options=-fobject-code" \
-    --height="$(tput lines)" --width="$(tput cols)" --warnings --test "$1"
-}
-
-_haskell_test_watch_pattern() {
-  # Runs and watches the tests that match a provided pattern.
-  stack test --file-watch grid:grid-test --ta "-p \"${1}\""
-}
-
-haskell_test_watch() {
-  # Accepts either a filepath or a pattern and runs a test-watcher for either.
-  if [ -f "$1" ]; then
-    _haskell_test_watch_path "$1"
-  else
-    _haskell_test_watch_pattern "$1"
-  fi
-}
-
-# Kubernetes
-kush() {
-  # Drop into a shell via Kubernetes. Shell defaults to /bin/bash.
-  local name=$1
-  local cmd=${2-/bin/bash}
-
-  kubectl exec -it "${name}" -- "${cmd}"
-}
-
-# Misc
-all_users() {
-  # Lists all of the known users in the Linux system
-  # Useful because when you type `~art` in a prompt and tab-complete, ZSH looks
-  # up all users whose names start with "art". It's also just interesting to
-  # have access to this information.
-  #
-  # NOTE: this is not as simple as `cat /etc/passwd` for reasons of which I'm
-  # not entirely sure.
-  getent passwd
-}
-
-test_true_color() {
-  # Run this to test if your terminal emulator supports True Color
-  curl --silent https://raw.githubusercontent.com/JohnMorales/dotfiles/master/colors/24-bit-color.sh | bash
-}
-
-path() {
-  # Pretty-print the $PATH variable
-  echo "$PATH" | tr : '\n'
-}
-
-nix_installed() {
-  # Lists the packages installed with `nix-env`
-  nix-env -q
-}
-
-nix_store() {
-  # Print the packages in /nix/store without the preceding hash
-  ls /nix/store | sed 's/[a-z0-9]*-//'
-}
-
-browse() {
-  # Open a URL in $BROWSER. Friendly for terminal input and output.
-  nohup "$BROWSER" $@ &
-}
-
-lh() {
-  # Opens http://localhost:<port> in your $BROWSER.
-  # Usage: `lh 8080`
-  # Here, in case it wasn't obvious, `lh` stands for "localhost".
-  browse "http://localhost:$1"
-}
-
-essids() {
-  # Returns a list of all ESSIDs the network card detects
-  local interface=${1-wlp4s0}
-  sudo iwlist "${interface}" scan | awk -F \" '{print $2}' | sed '/^\s*$/d'
-}
-
-mkdir_cd() {
-  # Make and cd into a directory or path
-  mkdir -p "$1" && cd "$1"
-}
-
-swap() {
-  # Swaps the names of files and directories.
-  local file_a="${1}"
-  local file_b="${2}"
-
-  if [ -d "${file_a}" ] && [ -d "${file_b}" ]; then
-    local backup=$(mktemp -d backup.XXX)
-
-    mv "${file_a}" "${backup}"
-    mv "${file_b}" "${file_a}"
-    mv "${backup}/${file_a}" "${file_b}"
-    rm -rf "${backup}"
-  elif [ -f "${file_a}" ] && [ -f "${file_b}" ]; then
-    local backup=$(mktemp backup.XXX)
-
-    mv "${file_a}" "${backup}"
-    mv "${file_b}" "${file_a}"
-    mv "${backup}" "${file_b}"
-    rm "${backup}"
-  fi
-
-  echo "Swapped: ${file_a} <-> ${file_b}"
-}
-
-bak() {
-  # Backup a file or a directory by appending a .bak extension to it.
-  mv "$1" "$1.bak"
-}
-
-unbak() {
-  # Restore a file by removing the .bak extension from it.
-  mv "$1.bak" "$1"
-}
-
-is_online() {
-  # Pings google.com and echos "Online" or "Offline" and returns the appropriate
-  # exit code. Could be useful in the ${PS1} variable.
-  wget -q --spider "http://google.com"
-
-  if [ $? -eq 0 ]; then
-    echo "Online"
-    return 0
-  else
-    echo "Offline"
-    return 1
-  fi
-}
-
-du_it_live() {
-  # Outputs and refreshes the size of a directory's content.
-  # Useful for watching a directory as large amounts of data are
-  # downloaded into it.
-  local directory="${1}"
-
-  while true; do
-    du -hc "${directory}" | tail -n 1 | tr -d '\n' && echo -n ' ' && sleep 0.5
-
-    # elipsis
-    echo -n '.' && sleep 0.5 &&
-    echo -n '.' && sleep 0.5 &&
-    echo -n '.' && sleep 0.5 &&
-
-    # clear the three-dots
-    echo -n '\b\b\b' && echo -n '   ' && echo -n '\r'
-  done
-}
-
-router() {
-  # Returns the IP address of the network's router.
-  # Useful in a call like `ping $(router)` to diagnose an internet problem.
-  netstat -nr | grep default | head -n 1 | awk '{ print $2 }'
-}
-
-monitor_dimensions() {
-  # Outputs the dimensions of your computer monitor
-  xdpyinfo | awk '/dimensions/{ print $2 }'
-}
-
-list_sinks() {
-  # Lists the available output sources (speakers?)
-  pacmd list-sinks | grep -e 'name:' -e 'index:'
-}
-
-list_sources() {
-  # List available input sources (microphones?)
-  pacmd list-sources | grep -e 'index:' -e device.string -e 'name:'
-}
-
-lt() {
-  # Convenience wrapper around `exa --tree`.
-  # Optionally accepts a number for the max-depth and a directory to list.
-  # $ lt 2 ./scripts
-
-  # lt
-  if [ -z ${1} ]; then
-    exa --tree --all
-
-  # lt 2
-  elif [[ "${1}" =~ '^[0-9]+$' ]] && [ -z ${2} ]; then
-    local depth="${1}"
-
-    exa --tree -all --level "${depth}"
-
-  # lt ./scripts
-  elif [ -z ${2} ]; then
-    local directory="${1}"
-
-    exa --tree --all "${directory}"
-
-  # lt 2 ./scripts
-  else
-    local depth=${1}
-    local directory="${2}"
-
-    exa --tree --all --level ${depth} "${directory}"
-  fi
-}
-
-gql() {
-  # Convenience wrapper around `http POST` that allows you write GQL queries in
-  # Vim before posting them to the server.
-  local endpoint="${1}"
-  local query="/tmp/http-query.gql"
-
-  vim "${query}" && \
-  echo "{\"query\":\"$(cat ${query})\"}" | \
-  http --body POST "${endpoint}"
-}
-
-# Nix
-nix_introspect() {
-  # Greps through my local nixpkgs repo for
-  rg --after-context 5 "\\b$1\\b\\s*=" "$(nix-instantiate --find-file nixpkgs)"
-}
-
-# Tmux
-t() {
-  # Find or create a Tmux session.
-  local session_name="${1}"
-  if ! tmux has-session -t "${session_name}" 2> /dev/null; then
-    local oldTMUX="${TMUX}"
-    unset TMUX
-    tmux new -d -s "${session_name}" -n "${session_name}"
-    export TMUX="${oldTMUX}"
-    unset oldTMUX
-
-    if command -v j >/dev/null; then
-      tmux send-keys -t "${session_name}" "j ${session_name}; clear" "C-m"
-    else
-      tmux send-keys -t "${session_name}"
-    fi
-  fi
-  if [[ -n "${TMUX}" ]]; then
-    tmux switch-client -t "${session_name}"
-  else
-    tmux attach -t "${session_name}"
-  fi
-}
-
-tk() {
-  # `tk`: "tmux kill". Kills a tmux session by name.
-  # If no arguments are provided, kills the current session after jumping to the previous session.
-  session_name="${1}"
-  if [ ! -z "${session_name}" ]; then
-    tmux kill-session -t "${session_name}"
-  else
-    session_name=tmux ls -f '#{?session_attached,#{session_name},}' | xargs
-    tmux switch-client -l
-    tmux kill-session -t "${session_name}"
-  fi
-}
-
-tmux_is_running() {
-  # Returns zero if tmux is running
-  # Although this is a simple function body, it's useful to encode esoteric
-  # knowledge that I will easily forget.
-  test -n "$TMUX"
-}
-
-tmux_focused_pane() {
-  # Returns the ID of the focused tmux pane.
-  # WIP
-  # tmux list-panes -F '#{pane_active} #{pane_tty}' | awk /1/{ print $1 }
-  echo 'Not implemented'
-}
-
-# Google3
-g3_root() {
-  # Outputs the root of the CitC client in g3
-  # NOTE: there is probably a function already supported by g4 to cd to the
-  # root, so support for this function may be dropped shortly.
-  echo "${PWD%%/google3/*}/google3"
-}
-
-# i3
-focus() {
-  # Focuses an i3 window by application name.
-  i3-msg "[class=\"$1\"] focus" >/dev/null
-}
-
-# zsh
-fns() {
-  # Outputs all available functions.
-  # `fns` was chosen instead of `functions`, since `functions` was already
-  # taken.
-  compgen -A function
-}
-
-aliases() {
-  # Outputs all available aliases.
-  compgen -a
-}
-
-keywords() {
-  # Outputs all of the shell's reserved keywords.
-  compgen -k
-}
-
-builtins() {
-  # Outputs all of the shell's builtin commands.
-  compgen -b
-}
-
-zle_insert_subshell() {
-  LBUFFER+='$(' ; RBUFFER=")$RBUFFER"
-}
-zle -N zle_insert_subshell
-bindkey '^j' zle_insert_subshell
-
-zle_insert_variable() {
-  LBUFFER+='${' ; RBUFFER="}$RBUFFER"
-}
-zle -N zle_insert_variable
-bindkey '^v' zle_insert_variable
-
-zle_insert_2x_dash() {
-  LBUFFER+=' --'
-}
-zle -N zle_insert_2x_dash
-bindkey '^[^f' zle_insert_2x_dash
-
-zle_insert_2x_quote() {
-  LBUFFER+=' "' ; RBUFFER="\"$RBUFFER"
-}
-zle -N zle_insert_2x_quote
-bindkey '^["' zle_insert_2x_quote
-
-zle_insert_quote() {
-  LBUFFER+=" '" ; RBUFFER="'$RBUFFER"
-}
-zle -N zle_insert_quote
-bindkey "^['" zle_insert_quote
diff --git a/configs/shared/zsh/functions.zsh b/configs/shared/zsh/functions.zsh
index 12825102ae95..f555ae4e9aa2 100644
--- a/configs/shared/zsh/functions.zsh
+++ b/configs/shared/zsh/functions.zsh
@@ -1,14 +1,3 @@
-# From Google's ZSH Hacks
-# NOTE: this file has since been modified by me.
-
-# Improvement to fasd's existing `zz` alias
-unalias zz
-zz() {
-  # TODO: Add documentation
-  local dir
-  dir="$(fasd -Rdl "$1" | fzf --query="$1" -1 -0 --no-sort +m)" && cd "${dir}" || return 1
-}
-
 fv() {
   # Usage: fv file pattern
   # This is useful when you know the fuzzy name of the file you want to edit
@@ -35,3 +24,540 @@ tj() {
     cd "${PWD/\/google3\/java//google3/javatests}"
   fi
 }
+
+snipit() {
+  # Take a screenshot and host it at https://screenshot.googleplex.com
+  # Adapted from SnipIt to fit my workflow.
+  server="https://screenshot.googleplex.com/upload"
+  file="${TEMP:-/tmp}/snipit_temp_$$.png"
+
+  # Capture
+  echo "SnipIt - Click a window, or drag to snip a region (Ctrl+C to cancel):" && \
+    import "$file" && \
+    echo "Sending image to server..." && \
+    uri=$(curl -sF "imagedata=@$file" $server) && \
+    c <<<"$uri" && \
+    echo "Copied \"$uri\" to your clipboard."
+}
+
+# Aptitude
+apts() {
+  # Searches aptitude package repository for $1, surrounding it in ^$ to ensure
+  # fewer results.
+  apt search "^$1$"
+}
+
+# Docker
+dsh() {
+  # Drop into a Docker shell. Shell defaults to /bin/bash.
+  container=$1
+  cmd=${2-/bin/bash}
+
+  docker exec -it "${container}" "${cmd}"
+}
+
+# Emacs
+dired() {
+  # Opens either the `$(pwd)` or `$1` in Emacs's `dired`.
+  # Uses i3 to focus Emacs.
+  directory=${1:-$(pwd)}
+  echo $directory
+  emacsclient --eval "(dired \"$directory\")" && focus Emacs
+}
+
+org_capture() {
+  # Spawns an Emacs frame running org-capture.
+  echo called
+  emacsclient --create-frame \
+              --frame-parameters '(quote (name . "org-protocol-capture"))' \
+              --eval '(org-capture)'
+}
+
+# Git
+conflicts() {
+  # Edit git conflicts one-by-one in your favorite editor.
+  ${EDITOR} "$(git status --porcelain | awk '/^UU/ { print $2 }')"
+}
+
+# GPG
+gpg_encrypt() {
+  # Convenience function around encryping files and directories.
+  # Appends a .gpg extension and deletes the unencrypted source.
+  local file=${1}
+
+  echo "Encrypting..."
+
+  if [ -f "${file}" ]; then
+    gpg --symmetric "${file}" && \
+    rm "${file}"
+
+  elif [ -d "${file}" ]; then
+    tar -cz "${file}" | gpg --symmetric --output "${file}.tar.gz.gpg"
+  fi
+
+  echo "Done."
+}
+
+gpg_decrypt() {
+  # Convenience function around decrypting .gpg files and directories.
+  # Deletes the original encrypted file with the .gpg extension.
+  local file=$1
+
+  echo "Decrypting..."
+
+  if [ -f "${file}" ]; then
+    gpg --decrypt "${file}" >"${file%.gpg}" && \
+    rm "${file}"
+
+  elif [ -d "${file}" ]; then
+    local outdir="${dirname%.tar.gz.gpg}"
+
+    if [ -d "${outdir}" ]; then
+      echo "Output directory, ${outdir}, already exists and will be overwritten by this command. Aborting..."
+      return 1
+    else
+      gpg --decrypt "${dirname}" | tar -xv
+    fi
+  fi
+
+  echo "Done."
+}
+
+# Python
+python_sandbox() {
+  # Creates a nix-shell with the specified arguments as Python packages
+  nix-shell -p "python36.withPackages(p: with p; [$@])"
+}
+
+# Haskell
+cabal_unhell() {
+  # Run this function to save yourself from Cabal hell.
+  # Note: this will require that you reinstall packages for your projects again.
+  find ~/.ghc -maxdepth 1 -type d -exec rm -rf {} \;
+  rm -rf ~/.cabal/{lib,packages,share}
+}
+
+haskell_sandbox() {
+  # Creates a nix-shell with the specified arguments as Haskell packages
+  nix-shell -p "haskellPackages.ghcWithPackages (p: with p; [$@])"
+}
+
+_haskell_test_watch_path() {
+  # Runs and watches the tests for a provided file path.
+  ghcid -c "stack ghci grid:lib grid:grid-test --ghci-options=-fobject-code" \
+    --height="$(tput lines)" --width="$(tput cols)" --warnings --test "$1"
+}
+
+_haskell_test_watch_pattern() {
+  # Runs and watches the tests that match a provided pattern.
+  stack test --file-watch grid:grid-test --ta "-p \"${1}\""
+}
+
+haskell_test_watch() {
+  # Accepts either a filepath or a pattern and runs a test-watcher for either.
+  if [ -f "$1" ]; then
+    _haskell_test_watch_path "$1"
+  else
+    _haskell_test_watch_pattern "$1"
+  fi
+}
+
+# Kubernetes
+kush() {
+  # Drop into a shell via Kubernetes. Shell defaults to /bin/bash.
+  local name=$1
+  local cmd=${2-/bin/bash}
+
+  kubectl exec -it "${name}" -- "${cmd}"
+}
+
+# Misc
+tldr_docs() {
+  # Helper function for submitting a new page to `tldr`.
+  # Usage: tldr_docs <cmd-name>
+  pushd ~/programming/tldr && \
+    gcb "$1" && \
+    "$EDITOR" . && \
+    echo "Next steps:" && \
+    echo "- commit changes" && \
+    echo "- push changes" && \
+    echo "- submit a pull-request to tldr" && \
+    popd # return to the original directory
+}
+
+ord_to_char() {
+  # Converts the ordinal, ASCII value of a character into its encoded
+  # representation.
+  #
+  # Usage:
+  # $ ord_to_char 65
+  # A
+  [ "$1" -lt 256 ] || return 1
+  printf "\\$(printf '%03o' "$1")\n"
+}
+
+char_to_ord() {
+  # Converts the ASCII representation of a character to its ordinal value.
+  #
+  # Usage:
+  # $ char_to_ord A
+  # 65
+  LC_CTYPE=C printf '%d\n' "'$1"
+}
+
+all_users() {
+  # Lists all of the known users in the Linux system
+  # Useful because when you type `~art` in a prompt and tab-complete, ZSH looks
+  # up all users whose names start with "art". It's also just interesting to
+  # have access to this information.
+  #
+  # NOTE: this is not as simple as `cat /etc/passwd` for reasons of which I'm
+  # not entirely sure.
+  getent passwd
+}
+
+escape_sequences() {
+  # Outputs a table of terminal escape sequences and their meaning.
+  echo -E '\a         Bell (alert)'
+  echo -E '\b         Backspace'
+  echo -E '\f         Formfeed'
+  echo -E '\n         New line'
+  echo -E '\r         Carriage return'
+  echo -E '\t         Horizontal tab'
+  echo -E '\v         Vertical tab'
+  echo -E "\'         Single quotation mark"
+  echo -E '\"         Double quotation mark'
+  echo -E '\\         Backslash'
+  echo -E '\?         Literal question mark'
+  echo -E '\uhhhh     Unicode character'
+  echo -E '\Uhhhhhhhh Unicode character'
+  echo -E '\xhh       ASCII character in hexadecimal notation'
+  echo -E '\xhhhh     Unicode character in hexadecimal notation if this escape sequence is used in a wide-character constant or a Unicode string literal.'
+}
+
+test_true_color() {
+  # Run this to test if your terminal emulator supports True Color
+  curl --silent https://raw.githubusercontent.com/JohnMorales/dotfiles/master/colors/24-bit-color.sh | bash
+}
+
+test_16_colors() {
+  # Useful for testing your terminal's theme.
+  echo -e "Normal: ${black}black${red}red${green}green${yellow}yellow${blue}blue${magenta}magenta${cyan}cyan${white}white"
+  echo -e "Bright: ${bright_black}black${bright_red}red${bright_green}green${bright_yellow}yellow${bright_blue}blue${bright_magenta}magenta${bright_cyan}cyan${bright_white}white"
+}
+
+test_text_formatting() {
+  # Useful when appraising a Tmux. Things can get strange with true colors and
+  # font rendering.
+  echo -e "\e[1mbold\e[0m"
+  echo -e "\e[3mitalic\e[0m"
+  echo -e "\e[4munderline\e[0m"
+  echo -e "\e[9mstrikethrough\e[0m"
+}
+
+test_unicode() {
+  # Run this to test if your terminal supports unicode character rendering.
+  echo -e '\u2600 \u2601 \u2602 \u2603 \u2604 \u2605 \u2606 \u2607 \u2608 \u2609 \u260A'
+  echo -e '\u260B \u260C \u260D \u260E \u260F \u2610 \u2611 \u2612 \u2613 \u2614 \u2615'
+  echo -e '\u2616 \u2617 \u2618 \u2619 \u261A \u261B \u261C \u261D \u261E \u261F \u2620'
+  echo -e '\u2621 \u2622 \u2623 \u2624 \u2625 \u2626 \u2627 \u2628 \u2629 \u262A \u262B'
+  echo -e '\u262C \u262D \u262E \u262F \u2630 \u2631 \u2632 \u2633 \u2634 \u2635 \u2636'
+  echo -e '\u2637 \u2638 \u2639 \u263A \u263B \u263C \u263D \u263E \u263F \u2640 \u2641'
+  echo -e '\u2642 \u2643 \u2644 \u2645 \u2646 \u2647 \u2648 \u2649 \u264A \u264B \u264C'
+  echo -e '\u264D \u264E \u264F \u2650 \u2651 \u2652 \u2653 \u2654 \u2655 \u2656 \u2657'
+  echo -e '\u2658 \u2659 \u265A \u265B \u265C \u265D \u265E \u265F \u2660 \u2661 \u2662'
+  echo -e '\u2663 \u2664 \u2665 \u2666 \u2667 \u2668 \u2669 \u266A \u266B \u266C \u266D'
+  echo -e '\u266E \u266F \u2670 \u2671 \u2672 \u2673 \u2674 \u2675 \u2676 \u2677 \u2678'
+  echo -e '\u2679 \u267A \u267B \u267C \u267D \u267E \u267F \u2680 \u2681 \u2682 \u2683'
+  echo -e '\u2684 \u2685 \u2686 \u2687 \u2688 \u2689 \u268A \u268B \u268C \u268D \u268E'
+  echo -e '\u268F \u2690 \u2691 \u2692 \u2693 \u2694 \u2695 \u2696 \u2697 \u2698 \u2699'
+  echo -e '\u269A \u269B \u269C \u269D \u269E \u269F \u26A0 \u26A1 \u26A2 \u26A3 \u26A4'
+  echo -e '\u26A5 \u26A6 \u26A7 \u26A8 \u26A9 \u26AA \u26AB \u26AC \u26AD \u26AE \u26AF'
+  echo -e '\u26B0 \u26B1 \u26B2 \u26B3 \u26B4 \u26B5 \u26B6 \u26B7 \u26B8 \u26B9 \u26BA'
+  echo -e '\u26BB \u26BC \u26BD \u26BE \u26BF \u26C0 \u26C1 \u26C2 \u26C3 \u26C4 \u26C5'
+  echo -e '\u26C6 \u26C7 \u26C8 \u26C9 \u26CA \u26CB \u26CC \u26CD \u26CE \u26CF \u26D0'
+  echo -e '\u26D1 \u26D2 \u26D3 \u26D4 \u26D5 \u26D6 \u26D7 \u26D8 \u26D9 \u26DA \u26DB'
+  echo -e '\u26DC \u26DD \u26DE \u26DF \u26E0 \u26E1 \u26E2 \u26E3 \u26E4 \u26E5 \u26E6'
+  echo -e '\u26E7 \u26E8 \u26E9 \u26EA \u26EB \u26EC \u26ED \u26EE \u26EF \u26F0 \u26F1'
+  echo -e '\u26F2 \u26F3 \u26F4 \u26F5 \u26F6 \u26F7 \u26F8 \u26F9 \u26FA \u26FB \u26FC'
+  echo -e '\u26FD \u26FE \u26FF'
+}
+
+path() {
+  # Pretty-print the $PATH variable
+  echo "$PATH" | tr : '\n'
+}
+
+nix_installed() {
+  # Lists the packages installed with `nix-env`
+  nix-env -q
+}
+
+nix_store() {
+  # Print the packages in /nix/store without the preceding hash
+  ls /nix/store | sed 's/[a-z0-9]*-//'
+}
+
+browse() {
+  # Open a URL in $BROWSER. Friendly for terminal input and output.
+  nohup "$BROWSER" $@ &
+}
+
+lh() {
+  # Opens http://localhost:<port> in your $BROWSER.
+  # Usage: `lh 8080`
+  # Here, in case it wasn't obvious, `lh` stands for "localhost".
+  browse "http://localhost:$1"
+}
+
+essids() {
+  # Returns a list of all ESSIDs the network card detects
+  local interface=${1-wlp4s0}
+  sudo iwlist "${interface}" scan | awk -F \" '{print $2}' | sed '/^\s*$/d'
+}
+
+mkdir_cd() {
+  # Make and cd into a directory or path
+  mkdir -p "$1" && cd "$1"
+}
+
+swap() {
+  # Swaps the names of files and directories.
+  local file_a="${1}"
+  local file_b="${2}"
+
+  if [ -d "${file_a}" ] && [ -d "${file_b}" ]; then
+    local backup=$(mktemp -d backup.XXX)
+
+    mv "${file_a}" "${backup}"
+    mv "${file_b}" "${file_a}"
+    mv "${backup}/${file_a}" "${file_b}"
+    rm -rf "${backup}"
+  elif [ -f "${file_a}" ] && [ -f "${file_b}" ]; then
+    local backup=$(mktemp backup.XXX)
+
+    mv "${file_a}" "${backup}"
+    mv "${file_b}" "${file_a}"
+    mv "${backup}" "${file_b}"
+    rm "${backup}"
+  fi
+
+  echo "Swapped: ${file_a} <-> ${file_b}"
+}
+
+bak() {
+  # Backup a file or a directory by appending a .bak extension to it.
+  mv "$1" "$1.bak"
+}
+
+unbak() {
+  # Restore a file by removing the .bak extension from it.
+  mv "$1.bak" "$1"
+}
+
+is_online() {
+  # Pings google.com and echos "Online" or "Offline" and returns the appropriate
+  # exit code. Could be useful in the ${PS1} variable.
+  wget -q --spider "http://google.com"
+
+  if [ $? -eq 0 ]; then
+    echo "Online"
+    return 0
+  else
+    echo "Offline"
+    return 1
+  fi
+}
+
+du_it_live() {
+  # Outputs and refreshes the size of a directory's content.
+  # Useful for watching a directory as large amounts of data are
+  # downloaded into it.
+  local directory="${1}"
+
+  while true; do
+    du -hc "${directory}" | tail -n 1 | tr -d '\n' && echo -n ' ' && sleep 0.5
+
+    # elipsis
+    echo -n '.' && sleep 0.5 &&
+    echo -n '.' && sleep 0.5 &&
+    echo -n '.' && sleep 0.5 &&
+
+    # clear the three-dots
+    echo -n '\b\b\b' && echo -n '   ' && echo -n '\r'
+  done
+}
+
+router() {
+  # Returns the IP address of the network's router.
+  # Useful in a call like `ping $(router)` to diagnose an internet problem.
+  netstat -nr | grep default | head -n 1 | awk '{ print $2 }'
+}
+
+monitor_dimensions() {
+  # Outputs the dimensions of your computer monitor
+  xdpyinfo | awk '/dimensions/{ print $2 }'
+}
+
+list_sinks() {
+  # Lists the available output sources (speakers?)
+  pacmd list-sinks | grep -e 'name:' -e 'index:'
+}
+
+list_sources() {
+  # List available input sources (microphones?)
+  pacmd list-sources | grep -e 'index:' -e device.string -e 'name:'
+}
+
+lt() {
+  # Convenience wrapper around `exa --tree`.
+  # Optionally accepts a number for the max-depth and a directory to list.
+  # $ lt 2 ./scripts
+
+  # lt
+  if [ -z ${1} ]; then
+    exa --tree --all
+
+  # lt 2
+  elif [[ "${1}" =~ '^[0-9]+$' ]] && [ -z ${2} ]; then
+    local depth="${1}"
+
+    exa --tree -all --level "${depth}"
+
+  # lt ./scripts
+  elif [ -z ${2} ]; then
+    local directory="${1}"
+
+    exa --tree --all "${directory}"
+
+  # lt 2 ./scripts
+  else
+    local depth=${1}
+    local directory="${2}"
+
+    exa --tree --all --level ${depth} "${directory}"
+  fi
+}
+
+gql() {
+  # Convenience wrapper around `http POST` that allows you write GQL queries in
+  # Vim before posting them to the server.
+  local endpoint="${1}"
+  local query="/tmp/http-query.gql"
+
+  vim "${query}" && \
+  echo "{\"query\":\"$(cat ${query})\"}" | \
+  http --body POST "${endpoint}"
+}
+
+# Nix
+nix_introspect() {
+  # Greps through my local nixpkgs repo for
+  rg --after-context 5 "\\b$1\\b\\s*=" "$(nix-instantiate --find-file nixpkgs)"
+}
+
+# Tmux
+t() {
+  # Find or create a Tmux session.
+  local session_name="${1}"
+  if ! tmux has-session -t "${session_name}" 2> /dev/null; then
+    local oldTMUX="${TMUX}"
+    unset TMUX
+    tmux new -d -s "${session_name}" -n "${session_name}"
+    export TMUX="${oldTMUX}"
+    unset oldTMUX
+
+    if command -v j >/dev/null; then
+      tmux send-keys -t "${session_name}" "j ${session_name}; clear" "C-m"
+    else
+      tmux send-keys -t "${session_name}"
+    fi
+  fi
+  if [[ -n "${TMUX}" ]]; then
+    tmux switch-client -t "${session_name}"
+  else
+    tmux attach -t "${session_name}"
+  fi
+}
+
+tk() {
+  # `tk`: "tmux kill". Kills a tmux session by name.
+  # If no arguments are provided, kills the current session after jumping to the previous session.
+  session_name="${1}"
+  if [ ! -z "${session_name}" ]; then
+    tmux kill-session -t "${session_name}"
+  else
+    session_name=tmux ls -f '#{?session_attached,#{session_name},}' | xargs
+    tmux switch-client -l
+    tmux kill-session -t "${session_name}"
+  fi
+}
+
+tmux_is_running() {
+  # Returns zero if tmux is running
+  # Although this is a simple function body, it's useful to encode esoteric
+  # knowledge that I will easily forget.
+  test -n "$TMUX"
+}
+
+tmux_focused_pane() {
+  # Returns the ID of the focused tmux pane.
+  # WIP
+  # tmux list-panes -F '#{pane_active} #{pane_tty}' | awk /1/{ print $1 }
+  echo 'Not implemented'
+}
+
+# Google3
+g3_root() {
+  # Outputs the root of the CitC client in g3
+  # NOTE: there is probably a function already supported by g4 to cd to the
+  # root, so support for this function may be dropped shortly.
+  echo "${PWD%%/google3/*}/google3"
+}
+
+citc_workspace() {
+  # Returns the name of your current CitC workspace
+  pwd | grep -o -P "$(whoami)\/[^\/]+"
+}
+
+codesearch() {
+  # Attempts to open the current directory in Google's Code Search.
+  local slug="$(pwd | grep -P -o 'google3\/.+$')"
+  browse "https://cs.corp.google.com/piper///depot/$slug"
+}
+
+cider() {
+  # Opens the current workspace and current directory in Google's Cider
+  # Not very useful at the moment because it cannot jump to the current file or
+  # line number. Should also support an Emacs integration at some point.
+  browse "https://cider.corp.google.com/?ws=$(citc_workspace)"
+}
+
+# i3
+focus() {
+  # Focuses an i3 window by application name.
+  i3-msg "[class=\"$1\"] focus" >/dev/null
+}
+
+# zsh
+fns() {
+  # Outputs all available functions.
+  # `fns` was chosen instead of `functions`, since `functions` was already
+  # taken.
+  compgen -A function
+}
+
+aliases() {
+  # Outputs all available aliases.
+  compgen -a
+}
+
+keywords() {
+  # Outputs all of the shell's reserved keywords.
+  compgen -k
+}
+
+builtins() {
+  # Outputs all of the shell's builtin commands.
+  compgen -b
+}
diff --git a/configs/shared/zsh/variables.zsh b/configs/shared/zsh/variables.zsh
index 5e8e67ed0221..40611805ad8a 100644
--- a/configs/shared/zsh/variables.zsh
+++ b/configs/shared/zsh/variables.zsh
@@ -1,20 +1,19 @@
-export TERMINAL=urxvtc
-export EDITOR=emacsclient
-export ALTERNATE_EDITOR=nvim
 export GPG_TTY=$(tty) # "It is important that this environment variable always reflects the output of the tty command". Source: https://gnupg.org/documentation/manuals/gnupg-devel/Invoking-GPG_002dAGENT.html
 
-BROWSER=google-chrome
-NIXIFY="$HOME/programming/nixify"
-DATE_FMT=%b-%d-%Y_%T # my preferred date formatting string used for generated filename
+date_fmt=%b-%d-%Y_%T # my preferred date formatting string used for generated filename
 
 # ZSH's static named directories
 hash -d pro=~/programming
-hash -d dot=~/programming/dotfiles
+hash -d dot="$DOTFILES"
 hash -d citc=/google/src/cloud/$USER
 hash -d doc=~/Documents
 hash -d d=~/Downloads
 hash -d ss=~/Pictures/screenshots
-hash -d org=~/Documents/org
+hash -d fonts="$DOTFILES/configs/linux/misc/.local/share/fonts"
+hash -d sounds="$DOTFILES/configs/linux/misc/.local/share/sounds"
+hash -d wallpaper="$DOTFILES/configs/linux/misc/.local/share/wallpaper"
+hash -d org="$ORG_DIRECTORY"
+hash -d x20=/google/data/rw/users/wp/wpcarro # remember: to access x20, you need to run `prodaccess`
 # named directories for commonly used projects
 hash -d korvus_framework=./java/com/google/corp/sales
 hash -d korvus_services=./corp/sales/casesautomation
@@ -23,6 +22,24 @@ hash -d ultra=./ads/doubleclick/systems/crm
 hash -d incentives_fe=./experimental/adservices/jarvis/jarvis_extension/jarvis_staging/js
 hash -d incentives_be=./experimental/adservices/tesseract/handlers/incentives
 
+# 8-bit colors
+black='\u001b[30m'
+red='\u001b[31m'
+green='\u001b[32m'
+yellow='\u001b[33m'
+blue='\u001b[34m'
+magenta='\u001b[35m'
+cyan='\u001b[36m'
+white='\u001b[37m'
+bright_black='\u001b[30;1m'
+bright_red='\u001b[31;1m'
+bright_green='\u001b[32;1m'
+bright_yellow='\u001b[33;1m'
+bright_blue='\u001b[34;1m'
+bright_magenta='\u001b[35;1m'
+bright_cyan='\u001b[36;1m'
+bright_white='\u001b[37;1m'
+
 # commonly used config files
 v="$HOME/.config/nvim/init.vim"
 e="$HOME/.emacs.d/init.el"
diff --git a/configs/shared/zsh/zle.zsh b/configs/shared/zsh/zle.zsh
new file mode 100644
index 000000000000..4ded511ffccf
--- /dev/null
+++ b/configs/shared/zsh/zle.zsh
@@ -0,0 +1,31 @@
+#!/usr/bin/env zsh
+
+zle_insert_subshell() {
+  LBUFFER+='$(' ; RBUFFER=")$RBUFFER"
+}
+zle -N zle_insert_subshell
+bindkey '^j' zle_insert_subshell
+
+zle_insert_variable() {
+  LBUFFER+='${' ; RBUFFER="}$RBUFFER"
+}
+zle -N zle_insert_variable
+bindkey '^v' zle_insert_variable
+
+zle_insert_2x_dash() {
+  LBUFFER+=' --'
+}
+zle -N zle_insert_2x_dash
+bindkey '^[^f' zle_insert_2x_dash
+
+zle_insert_2x_quote() {
+  LBUFFER+=' "' ; RBUFFER="\"$RBUFFER"
+}
+zle -N zle_insert_2x_quote
+bindkey '^["' zle_insert_2x_quote
+
+zle_insert_quote() {
+  LBUFFER+=" '" ; RBUFFER="'$RBUFFER"
+}
+zle -N zle_insert_quote
+bindkey "^['" zle_insert_quote